I looked at this question as I too plan to drive a Sharp Memory LCD manually with my own code at some point. From your question and comments I think you are going about it the wrong way, even if you are already very proficient with the electronics side of the task.
As mentioned, the breakout board is the easiest way to connect the screen and the library is the easiest way to program it. I suggest you use both initially and then replace them one by one. I did this when driving a 32x32 LED matrix.
Once you have a little bit of code running that displays what you want on the screen, try removing the breakout board and wiring the display yourself without changing the code at all. If the display is not what you expect, you know the problem is in the wiring so you don't waste time looking into your code.
Once the wiring is sorted, start on the driver code. Leave the wiring and your code that makes the display show what you want untouched so that you know any problems are in your driver code. The other advantage of this is that you have the working library as reference for how the screen works and what signals to send with what sort of timing.
As a pointer to why your code is not doing what you expect, I think you may be misunderstanding how the screen works. Your question and code suggest you may be trying to display ASCII characters on the screen which I believe can be done easily with some LCD displays but I'm fairly sure that these LCDs are not character based - you have to manually set or clear each individual dot. I think the minimum number of dots you can set at a time is a full single line of the display.
In your code you have a delay of 3000ms after every byte send. At that rate it would take 2mins 30secs just to transfer the data for a single line of the screen so maybe you are sending the correct data, but are not waiting long enough to see the results. I've also read that you have to do something (sorry, not quite sure what) at least once per second to prevent problems with the screen - this suggests that taking over 2mins to send a line of data could not work as you expect.